Sunday, November 13, 2005

How to Lose a Guy

* Another gentleman just mailed me (as in the real kind of mail) a thank you card for hosting my game night. Maybe I've been a little too hard on the Austin men ...

I just watched "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days," and I am telling you, that is one the funniest movies ever! What Kate Hudson does is so crazy and so TRUE! (photoshopping and scrapbooking their future children's pictures, judging Matthew McConaughey's relationship skills by how well he takes care of their "Love Fern," inserting herself in to "boys' night.") Oh, my goodness! And, he still manages to suggest Couple's Therapy!

I heard he might be named "Sexiest Man of the Year," btw. There is nothing wrong with a good ol' Southern gentleman earning that label - there aren't nearly enough of them these days!

The gentleman who took this picture kissed my hand as he bade me farewell ... I miss those kinds of things - Austin men seem to be either too weird or too laidback to bother with gentility, but I know there are still some men
out there who believe in it! :)


Anonymous said...

Kissing hands eh ? I'm a guy, I wish that was still an okay thing to do, but most of us won't do that, has to be brought off just right, from the sublime to the ridiculous is but a single step.

Beautiful photograph.

Candidly Caroline said...

I agree. It could be very hard to find the right situation, but, if done right, it will have quite an impact!
On an aside, I don't think men get enough credit for all the work they have to do during dating. It takes a lot of guts just to ask a woman on a date. Thank goodness it's the men who mostly still do that, or I would never go on any dates!

El Jefe Maximo said...

I was the anon. commenter from earlier (and a few previous comments). I remember in my own dating days (married now) all the gnashing of teeth surrounding "the Decision" -- deciding to ask somebody out.

Looking back (and the wisdom of advanced age -- 40's), I think most men plow so much psychic energy into the initial decision to ask for a date; and then, once the "yes" is obtained, worry so much about not putting a foot wrong, that it's little wonder so many first and early dates don't live up to hopes and expectations.

Seems like the best first dates, from a guy view, were "no date dates" -- that is, where you go out with somebody, but it managed to occur in a non-threatening context where losing face by asking and getting shot down wasn't a possibility. If there was interest after a "no date date" it was easier to pursue with a real date.

Back on the hand kissing thing. Boy I always liked that in movies, but never ran into a situation where I could pull it off without it seeming smarmy, so never tried it. Too bad. Hyper-romantic gestures are hard to pull off nowadays, we live in a cynical age.

On that note, if you ever get the opportunity, check out a book called "A Lifelong Passion" (Maylunas and Mironenko, editors)-- the correspondence of the last Russian Tsar and Tsarina. Boy, those Victorians could write some steamy, romantic correspondence. Almost worth the firing squad to have a relationship like that. But in our era, where everything is permitted, everything is also corny, and nothing is really said.

hiari said...

You my friend are BEAUTIFUL!

Candidly Caroline said...

I'll keep that in mind, Jefe, and I agree, although I think both sexes really do like to follow the predator/prey model, too. What I mean is, from what I have seen, most men really do like the thrill of the chase, and most women really do like the thrill of being pursued.
Basically, all of it is very, very complicated!
P.S. 40's is not exactly advanced age!

Candidly Caroline said...

Thanks to anonymous and hiari for the nice compliments! :)

Kaan said...

I agree with Jefe, the best dating results happen when the guy doesn't feel like everything is riding on this one date. That whole mentality can be super stressful. That's one of the reasons a group setting can be so helpful: it removes the spotlight from the guy and allows him to relax a little, and just be himself. And this goes for the women, too. On most first dates, I think there's a tendency for both guy/girl to avoid looking dumb, so they're not quite who they normally are, as they're trying to avoid the dumbness. But when you've got friends around, it removes the spotlight and loosens everyone up. So my advice is to go out with groups of friends, and throw parties often. Besides, parties are just plain fun, whether you meet someone interesting or not. ;)

Candidly Caroline said...

I concur!

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